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I'm sure many of you sympathize.

This is why I had to change my LJ name.

If you recall, my mom got all crazy and stalkery several months ago because childings said "Jesus f'ing Christ" in my FB. So I was very happy when my mom decided to give up FB for Lent.

Well, that was her rationale for leaving. Her *real* reason, she told me, was that not being on FB forced others to call her. They knew she wouldn't see their statuses, so they would have no choice but to phone.

Well, she came back for her birthday so she could collect her happy birthday wishes. She said she wasn't sure she'd stay on.

On Saturday, after incredible unit jackassery wherein our PT test was actually cancelled after I'd paid for a room on post so I wouldn't be late to an 0630 formation, I asked in my FB, "WHAT THE FUCK?"

My mom sent me an email saying my post was one of the reasons she thought she wouldn't return to FB. Couldn't I have just said, "What the heck?"

Well, no. It was not a "What the heck!" situation. It was a "What the fuck?" situation. There is a world of difference.

I'm thinking I should post George Carlin's famous cheer as my next status to get rid of the pious old cow:

"Ratshit, batshit, dirty old twat! 69 assholes tied in a knot! Hooray, lizard shit, FUCK!"

Comments

( 9 comments — Leave a comment )
(Deleted comment)
garpu
Apr. 23rd, 2012 02:32 am (UTC)
Damn. shadowcell beat me to it.

What the hell kind of bullshit is that? You aren't 12. Gotta love the faux guilt trip, as well. (that she'd stay gone from FB....although if that's all it takes you might want to try using "fuck" as every part of speech.)
helenkacan
Apr. 23rd, 2012 02:42 am (UTC)
FACTS:
YOUR blog.
YOUR fb.
YOUR honest expression of frustration with an organization that is making your life HELL.

If she doesn't like it, she can just keep staying away. On fb, she has to come to terms that she's not there as your mother, she's just another name.

BTW, I've read studies showing that people with severe chronic pain who use REAL swear words tend to get more relief from the pain. Using cutesy-sounding euphemisms doesn't achieve the same results. It was heartening to read something that confirmed my own experience. In other words ... FUCK, YEAH!
swestrup
Apr. 23rd, 2012 03:38 am (UTC)
Can't really give advice, as I don't have a batshit mother, but *HUGS* and supporting thoughts, I can give.
vonjunzt
Apr. 23rd, 2012 04:02 am (UTC)
WHAT THE FUCK?
theidolhands
Apr. 23rd, 2012 04:04 am (UTC)
uh, filter your mom out of some/all updates?

reginaterrae
Apr. 23rd, 2012 06:33 pm (UTC)
Her *real* reason, she told me, was that not being on FB forced others to call her. They knew she wouldn't see their statuses, so they would have no choice but to phone.

Wouldn't they? Sorry, I don't have a batshit mother either, but I do sympathize. How did you turn out sane?
desert_vixen
Apr. 23rd, 2012 10:25 pm (UTC)

(((( ))))
kitten_goddess
Apr. 26th, 2012 11:59 am (UTC)
I'm so sorry your mother is giving you such a hard time!

On a happier note, thanks for sharing George Carlin's cheer. I've never heard of it.
( 9 comments — Leave a comment )

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