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Lady K's Big Fat Feminism Talk Part 2

Now, more than ever, rule 2 is being ignored. No one is responsible for anything. This is a societal problem and it's infested feminism in a terrible way. Rule 1 is still true; men are afraid of women laughing at them, and women are afraid men will kill them. Men are still killing women. About a year ago, a boy stabbed a girl to death because she wouldn't go to prom with him. He knew she wasn't interested, he knew she had a boyfriend. He killed her in a pure example of Rule 1. Women are penalized for defending themselves, and when men are penalized for raping or killing women, often they are seen as the victims, not the women who suffered the harm themselves.

Feminism is good for men. It points out that patriarchy (a word you seldom hear me use, but it's operative here) forces men into roles they may not want either. A boy who likes the arts and expresses his feelings is no less masculine than the football player. An adult man should be able to cry over loss. Patriarchy tells them they shouldn't, so men should be able to claim feminism as a movement for themselves, too.

That would also address Rule 1. The more men teach their sons that they are not entitled to women's bodies, the healthier society will be. The more boys learn that they have the right to the toys and games they like, the hobbies they like, and the clothing they like, the healthier they will be.

Unfortunately, young feminists have become a bunch of spoiled babies who ignore Rule 2. What has caused this is an essay unto itself. I saw this starting to happen in the mid-90s, and it's borne fruit now.

20-something feminists have all too often become "Tumblr feminists" whose interest is in getting what they want, without working towards it, or prioritizing anything. I summarize it in the sentence, "2010s feminists are afraid someone will call them a name." When someone does call them a name, they run to Mommy and Daddy, and the role of Mommy and Daddy is played by Government.

For decades I have been saying over and over that if you are a woman, government is NOT your friend. Don't engage with it! Instead, governments, particularly those in universities where young men and women are often on their own for the very first time, are invoked as parents. Personal responsibility is in the trash bin. Did a young woman regret having sex with that young man? Cry rape! Did she not get into the university she wanted? Cry racism! Does she not receive the pay she wants after going to university? Cry oppression! But under no circumstances, NONE, should she ever consider that she's a grown woman with agency who perhaps shouldn't have slept with that guy, or studied a semester at another school in order to get into the university she prefers, or not taken that liberal arts degree and taken a science or trade instead.

(That last example is my personal glass house and I'll throw rocks in it if I want to.)

Recently, Rolling Stone ran an article about a brutal rape at University of Virginia that apparently never took place. When the woman who claimed to be the victim was confronted, she blamed a man who did not know her, her friends, and the university. Take responsibility for her own words? Under no circumstances. Realize she got an uninvolved person in trouble with his reputation? Not her problem. This kind of thing has to end.

On the other hand, we have the Steubenville rapists, with whom CNN sympathized, lamenting that these poor young men are having their futures taken away from them. Far be it from these boys to take responsibility for what they did. When you consider that they were enabled by adults who had responsibility for them, the situation becomes even worse.

This is the paradox of 2015 feminism. We are still being attacked by men, and men are still being covered for. In response, young women "reclaim" the word slut, invent or exaggerate attacks on them, and look to governments to make laws about their grievances. The laws exist, actually. Nothing new needs creating. What 2015 feminists need to do is woman up and start acting responsible for themselves. (to be continued...oh yes.)


( 3 comments — Leave a comment )
Mar. 1st, 2015 08:42 pm (UTC)
Do you have an issue with reclaiming the word slut?
Mar. 2nd, 2015 12:30 am (UTC)
Yes! There is nothing good about that word at all.
Mar. 2nd, 2015 02:59 am (UTC)
I think "reclaiming" the word slut is a misunderstanding by some people of objections to slut-shaming. Objectors of slut-shaming are saying, "don't you call me a slut for doing x, y or z, because those things don't make me a slut," while the reclaimers are saying, "don't you call me a slut as if the word means something bad."
( 3 comments — Leave a comment )


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