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Perhaps I'm looking for too much logic....

But why is century-plus old vampire Edward Cullen in HIGH SCHOOL?

I have no intention of reading these books or seeing the movie, but that's one piece of wtfkery that I want to see explained.

Despite the vague horror theme, I'm not going to insult The Bearer of the Yellow Sign by bringing him out as an icon. "Twilight" merits only a constipated cat.


( 24 comments — Leave a comment )
(Deleted comment)
Mar. 24th, 2009 05:10 am (UTC)
Yeah, but since he's going to be 16 for all eternity does that mean he'll be perpetually in Grade 11 until the WORLD'S END????? That's the logic gap for me. Easier to keep him at home and say he's being homeschooled, but that's just me writing with, y'know, common sense and not being a Mormon.
Mar. 24th, 2009 02:19 pm (UTC)
See, if his family have presumably somehow managed to obtain (or otherwise fudge the issue of) legal documentation for his apparent age of 16*, wouldn't it be easier all-round to do the same, but make him 18? So he wouldn't have to bother with school at all?

*Disclaimer: I don't know if they have, haven't read the books/seen the film. You'll have to excuse me if my ignorance is showing here, but don't you need a SSN to do most things in America? (Though I'll grant that a Sparkly!Vampire's list of "things I want to do" might well differ quite drastically from a human's. ;))

(P.S. Whoa. The same guy who played Cedric is also Edward in this Twilight thingy? :has evidently been living in a cave:)
Mar. 24th, 2009 02:31 pm (UTC)
Paragraph 1...yes, and for that matter, a lot of people finish high school at 17, or drop out of school altogether.

Paragraph 2...me neither. You do need an SSN to do most things here, but there is starting to be a large dissident movement about this.
Mar. 24th, 2009 05:07 am (UTC)
It's teh dumb anyway.

Besides, he got pwned by Wormtail in Goblet of Fire. :)
Mar. 24th, 2009 05:10 am (UTC)
He was dating Cho Chang so he deserved it.
(Deleted comment)
Mar. 24th, 2009 02:32 pm (UTC)
I'm sorry to hear you read the book. If there's anything I can do to help you recover, let me know.
Mar. 24th, 2009 05:37 pm (UTC)

Forced is a good word for it.

Also, watching your every move - is stalkery. Not romantic.

I got 75 pages into the second one before I went, "No, thanks!".

Go here for series deconstruction by a former Mormon that is HILARIOUS: http://stoney321.livejournal.com/317176.html

Mar. 24th, 2009 07:52 pm (UTC)
I had to take time out to read that whole thing. Awesome. Thanks so much!
Mar. 24th, 2009 08:53 pm (UTC)
I got to the blank pages in the second book and peed myself laughing.
Mar. 25th, 2009 04:44 pm (UTC)
the original by Joseph Smith

That would be the original novel by Solomon Spalding, stolen by Sidney Rigdon and posthumously used by known con-man Joseph Smith to found the LDS organization. (See Wikipedia, et al.)
Mar. 24th, 2009 06:54 am (UTC)
Well, did you expect something logical from the ::cough, cough:: writer's mind? Remember, she's interested in doing indoctrination hidden behind a glamour.

And I say ICK-ICK-ICK to the entire phenomenon.
Mar. 24th, 2009 02:34 pm (UTC)
I got the impression that Meyer has grown up sheltered and doesn't know how to write anything BUT Mormon-coloured society. I've heard of worse; remember the Star Wars novel "The Marriage of Princess Leia"? That's a temple marriage she's having with Han Solo at the end.
Mar. 24th, 2009 07:43 am (UTC)
I actually saw the movie, which was quite lame, and in the movie they have a collection of graduation caps. They do four years, graduate, move on, and do another four somewhere else. Perpetual High School. I would hate my life.
(Deleted comment)
Mar. 24th, 2009 02:35 pm (UTC)
This, so hard.
Mar. 24th, 2009 07:43 pm (UTC)
I liked high school. I'd do it forever, even if it got a tad boring aceing all my classes because I've done them over and over again. Only so much Jr. year Lit I could stand before I just drained the teacher and took over the course.
Mar. 24th, 2009 07:53 pm (UTC)
You're one of the few people I know who enjoyed high school I couldn't wait to get out. I didn't even go to graduation.
Mar. 24th, 2009 09:53 pm (UTC)
I guess it helps when your high school is insanely weird. :)
Mar. 24th, 2009 09:56 pm (UTC)
And in Heidelberg.
Mar. 24th, 2009 01:17 pm (UTC)
But why is century-plus old vampire Edward Cullen in HIGH SCHOOL?

Two guesses:

(1) For exactly the same reason that Weirdly Imapervert is lurking outside a high school in his panel van, or

(2) He really, really never got the hang of trigonometry.
(Deleted comment)
Mar. 24th, 2009 03:11 pm (UTC)
I've been watching "Buffy". That would be a good ending.
(Deleted comment)
Mar. 24th, 2009 04:34 pm (UTC)
There really has to be an anime spoof of that, with the Bella-character slapping the Edward character and exclaiming, "Hentai! Hidoi desu!"
Mar. 24th, 2009 05:07 pm (UTC)
My sister read the books while high as a kite recovering from having her knees reconstructed in succession. She said they only made sense while she was on prescription painkillers.
Mar. 24th, 2009 08:55 pm (UTC)
That could've been my problem. I was stone cold sober when I read them.
(Deleted comment)
Mar. 26th, 2009 02:19 am (UTC)
I categorically refuse to watch it. Most of it is the twee factor, but the rest is the eeeeeyew, chick flick factor. That and the stalkery premise is skin-crawling.
( 24 comments — Leave a comment )


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